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there are always exceptions to every rule and no one stereotype is specifically gender centered. i view chemistry as a foundation to build on and thanks to my age my immediate cravings are not always to get into her pants...some things are worth waiting for...you perhaps
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I'm not seeing the conflict or any complication. I don't think you can get one without the other. With no spark, there can be no fire; long-lasting, short and intense, or otherwise. Smart as a horse and hung like Einstein.
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Interesting topic, to me "compatibility" is the catalyst to good conversation, trust, affection, lifestyle, health and maybe a lot more. Some sites cater specifically to long term relationships, dating, marriage etc. This site has a different appearance, non the less, that info in a profile can quickly determine one's success or failure at a glance leading to conversation or being ignored aka. prejudged. I like a pretty face, happy smile and nice hair, however, bad attitude is an instant delete. People are on here for many different reasons, all age groups and sexual preferences, fantasies etc. I've learned on this site that its not out of ordinary to be in a long term relationship and have a void in one's sex life. Of course my opinion , that being said, remains unknown whether Compatibility or Chemistry makes any difference, might be met with values, morals and ethics, Thanks.
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Ms Wantingsexymind2, While your gender assignments might well be subject for debate, we couldn't agree more with your observations concerning the differing types of rendezvous. While we strive to always be non-judgemental, and wouldn't dare to try and make a value judgement on either of them, for us , compatibility reigns supreme. In fact, we sacrifice everything else in this pursuit, resulting in a lot of spare time spent together with just the two of us. But, as you seem to suggest, in a venue such as this, there is nothing so important as following the advice that Polonius gave to his son Laertes in "Hamlet" ; "This above all: to thine own self be true" Know what you want BEFORE you seek it out, and never deviate from that choice. Having to "settle" has never brought anyone joy, and compromise, in this instance, is usually unsatisfactory for all concerned. Too often our peers hereabouts place far more emphasis on right now, rather than right for us. So....before you look for someone new, be sure to look at yourself, or yourselves first. Once you've done that, finding whatever you want should come easy.
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Great blog hun and I totally agree with you, it takes time to make a connection with someone no matter if it's at a social setting, a website. Getting to know someone takes time chemistry is important with any relationship..
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Thank you, I'm sure that my transparency shines right through those words. I'm didn't realize that this site has so many other similarities or connections with other venues. Certainly my knowledge with social media is limited mainly because I have a long term relationship and my interest in this site specifically was for a different reason. So, if what you say is right on, then chemistry is the motivation and compatibility is the go/no go barometer should there ever be that special individual that decides to open up and be friendly with me. I would have hoped not to offend anyone who might read this, but purely be viewed as a conversation that no doubt is intended for input or discussion. I'm sure that the data retrieved from that study was fascinating. Thank you for sharing !!
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I believe you mentioned men looking for chemistry, women looking for compatibility. That's a conflict. If men and women aren't viewing their searches the same way, we're all bound to be disappointed. It's like using a telescope when you need a microscope, and vice versa. I've had both types of relationships. I don't think there's more of one than the other. Smart as a horse and hung like Einstein.
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It is an interesting concept, and one I will surely keep in mind the next time I send an introductory email to a potential new friend. Oh and BTW [image] is there anything ELSE I can do for you (read TO you. )? My Bedside Table, on HNW How Did They Get There CleavageFan, the Security Risk [post 3312759] My Private Blog – Tell me All your Secrets
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I swing, and it has to be with people that are compatible with me and I am comfortable with them.No pressure on my end. If it is meant to be than we will go for it. Sometimes things just turn on and the sex is amazing!!!
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I think you are spot on in your thinking! And I couldn't agree more!
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"Stereotyping" was my word, your topic IS interesting, of course with age there are more opportunity for experiences short and long term as for me the chemistry thesis leads to more girl...friends than lovers
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I've heard many variations on the theme and I think they're all pretty much correct. Women dangle the promise of sex in order to get companionship, men dangle the promise of companionship in order to get sex. (yes, not all men and not all women) I do believe that the chemistry/compatibility connundrum is gender/biology related. With a few exceptions, and those are usually bound by distance, I've found that the men that contact me have no interest in finding out if we're compatible anywhere else but in how fast we can get into the sack.
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Yes, I am a chemistry first man. There is a science in getting to know someone.
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These days I would prefer a long term encounter but a fwb is a consideration. Science is really all about the study and knowledge of a natural or physical phenomena. Hence; a potential partner.
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Sideways pictures? . Here I thought you just liked to lay down a lot... But you should be happy... uʍop ǝpısdn ʇou s,ʇı ʇsɐǝן ʇɐ I think it's the same for everyone... men, women, and couples. People that jump into things fast are often just looking for the *thrill*, and soon bored... whether they realize that or not.
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1/28/2017 4:47 am |
I'm attracted by the physical, but if there's no mental chemistry, fugetaboutit.
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So folks..... what say you? Do you think this tends to be gender specific? I don't think it is gender specific. I think both genders do both things. As a man or as a woman, or even as a couple who swings, where do you fit in on this? I fit in on both sides of that spectrum. I do both and it serves me well. Are you one to look for chemistry first? Or one to discover compatibility? I think I do these in reverse according to what you have here. I look for compatibility then move to discovering chemistry. At least when it comes to this site .
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