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How many no's does it take?  

AnewWoman 65F
296 posts
3/5/2020 12:50 pm
How many no's does it take?

I believe it was Zig Ziglar who said never give up until you have heard no at least 3 times. I receive lots of requests to meet and therefore say no thanks frequently. For this question, my reason for saying no is irrelevant. I get all sorts of responses after saying no; some saying their loss, some saying my loss, some begging me to meet. The list goes on. What I would like to know is how many no's does it take for you to say ok and move on? In the comment section maybe mention your success rate for not giving up should that be the case.
1 no and I'm out of there.
2 just to double check they really meant no.
3 no's are enough for me, then I'm gone.
3's only the beginning for the right person.
I never give up.


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
3/5/2020 1:33 pm

In real life - I'm in sales... lol and Zig is an asshole... lol... So three.... 😁
In matters of the heart... One.
No time for games or some bullshit chase. There are too many opportunities out there. And if a woman doesn't see a possibility with me? No worries... 🌹🍷🍷😎

Zig... you made me laugh. That guy is a slightly overrated tool.... and my boss's idol. lol 😂 😮 But... he was right about - THREE! 👍 ❗❗❗


AnewWoman replies on 3/5/2020 5:30 pm:
I totally agree. 30 years ago I had bosses who thought the sun rose and set in Zig Ziglar. I couldn't stand the guy. I think a common trait of these people is they do it for the kill. It's not the money, it's the fact they won. And once finished with that sale, it was forgotten because it was time to pursue the next sale.

shadowtoo69 68M  
1056 posts
3/5/2020 1:59 pm

Most times just one. If I see the person around 3 or 4 months later I might drop them a line and see if their interest have changed..


lonlyforlove2 81M
32704 posts
3/5/2020 2:08 pm

I think three with respect, but one has to follow his heart. You never know only one more might be the winner. Just be respectful and realistic about it..

Stop by at lonlyforlove2
also see Lunch with Lonly , we get snow tomorrow
Check my blog on New Community, "A photo of my big Pecker"
also, " My Sunday afternoon with the kids'


countryliving67 71T

3/5/2020 2:10 pm

Just once everybody. I cannot believe the number of rude people I’ve came across in the short time I’ve been doing my search. I am a crossdresser and really thought that we were here to support each other. But when you say hi to someone that just looked at your profile and won’t respond by saying at least a “no” what else would you call it but rude


flannel_light 61F
4586 posts
3/5/2020 2:22 pm

i have tried with one gentleman on a few times and needless to say he is a standard member so i sent him a message on IM and to his private mailbox he set up but nothing . I finally gave up after 3 times. With my heart it just takes only once.

The Light is shinning and she is lonely and waiting in the darkness.


h4rry66 57M

3/5/2020 2:44 pm

Its difficult to give up with a beautiful lady like you, but no means no. X


1seeking1 58F
3767 posts
3/5/2020 2:52 pm

Curious if the answers differ based on what gender you are. I find males here have hard time accepting no.


AnewWoman replies on 3/5/2020 5:18 pm:
At the time I'm responding to you it looks like 80% are saying it only takes one no. My thought is 50% is more realistic based my experience. I was actually more interested in the comments as to why one no is not enough. Thanks for your comment. Good point.

8848tuit 71M

3/5/2020 2:56 pm

If given a good reason as to no, then I stop


mr_ric_hard 63M

3/5/2020 3:07 pm

How many no's does it usually take?


Blee761 62M  
519 posts
3/5/2020 3:36 pm

Maybe if the woman in question is vague about her "no" I will probe a little more. Otherwise, I don't waste time with someone who would not want to get to know and be with me.


Usemyhardon 54M

3/5/2020 3:54 pm

Once is enough. Don’t believe in being pushy. Offer to be friends and let it go


classicalrebel4 68M
1755 posts
3/5/2020 5:13 pm

Once should be enough unless there is a need to reword the request to clarify things.

Please don't let me be misunderstood.


tresennui 69F  
2482 posts
3/5/2020 5:21 pm

After I give one no, unless the second request comes with a compelling sales pitch, I just ignore, or if grossly obnoxious...block.

Tresennui
Succumbing to Curiosity...read me at tresennui


tresennui 69F  
2482 posts
3/5/2020 5:22 pm

    Quoting tresennui:
    After I give one no, unless the second request comes with a compelling sales pitch, I just ignore, or if grossly obnoxious...block.
And...I only ask once. If someone’s not interested I do not pursue anymore.

Tresennui
Succumbing to Curiosity...read me at tresennui


ed6569 53M
108 posts
3/5/2020 5:25 pm

I hear no just once and I'm done, some ppl never heard of the word.


LuvWmn_N_Sex 69M
156 posts
3/5/2020 6:07 pm

If the Treasure is Pleasure and from a Realistic source, I may never give up because often a great deal of time is necessary to present my case. I choose to make requests after adequate consideration. Likewise, I expect that offers are not accepted without rational cause!


Kdream_flyer76K 47M

3/5/2020 6:19 pm

One no is plenty. If she was nice about it then maybe we can chat again without meeting. If she was rude about it then I just block her so I never make the mistake of trying to say hello again.


looking4u69ca 63M  
4322 posts
3/5/2020 8:34 pm

Usually once is enough.
Sometimes 2 after a short period of time.
Give the woman time to think about her answer.


sassos 57M
41 posts
3/6/2020 2:33 am

One then move on - let's not waste each others time....


TicklePlease 56F  
13851 posts
3/6/2020 6:18 am

    Quoting Blee761:
    Maybe if the woman in question is vague about her "no" I will probe a little more. Otherwise, I don't waste time with someone who would not want to get to know and be with me.
^^This

Sometimes I say no for logistical reasons like distance or availability, and tell the person that.... if those things change I might think differently if that person reaches out again.
Sometimes it's because my schedule is ridiculously busy, or there's a medical reason like driving-foot surgery that limits my known availability that I say no. But I make it clear what the reason is.
I try to be clear if I say no when a person doesn't fit what I'm seeking. THOSE folks I don't want to hear from again, but if they do fit what I'm seeking, sometimes that no can be a "not right now, but I won't mind if you check back respectfully later."


50I1guy 103M

3/6/2020 10:56 am

I’m old enough and mature enough to to accept no the first time BUT what is aggravating is the vast majority who simply ignore without even trying to find out if I’m worth their time. NO I can handle but rudeness is something entirely different, just tell me no thank you were you not taught any manners at all?


AnewWoman 65F
273 posts
3/6/2020 3:22 pm

    Quoting 50I1guy:
    I’m old enough and mature enough to to accept no the first time BUT what is aggravating is the vast majority who simply ignore without even trying to find out if I’m worth their time. NO I can handle but rudeness is something entirely different, just tell me no thank you were you not taught any manners at all?
As much as I can see your point, I still have to disagree with you. You happen to be a standard member who can't view profiles. Now add in the gold members who can read profiles, but don't. You are saying some say no without taking the time to find out if you are worth their time. Neither have you if you think about it. Maybe the reason you are not worth their time is clearly explained in their profile. Just maybe the person is tired of having to say why when they already have. You just choose not to see it.


ProfessorNaught 111M
1406 posts
3/6/2020 6:32 pm

Zig Ziglar may be outdated as even in sales they say 6-7 no's before you get to yes.

But this isn't about sales or sex for that matter. My time is precious. Say no and I'm gone. But then again, I never played the cat-n-mouse game with women either.

However, if you were forced to reach out to men, if that was your only expectation and chance of talking or meeting someone. How would you develop around the word 'no'?

Try to flip the table. Women rarely are in the same position.


Yours_4A_knight 59M

3/8/2020 8:44 pm

I would be thrilled . . .well would have been thrilled back when I could send messages . .to have received a polite "Thanks but not for me." For the most part I got nothing at all back.

Not the Whole Truth but the truth that I can see.


lickinislivin 52M
17 posts
3/9/2020 5:19 am

You are fucking sexy so It's probably going to take a lot


RipeseedsNstream 43M

3/9/2020 7:50 am

Well first off let me state for the record, That it all depends On the person and if there seems to actually be anything forming. Also I like to find out
“Why” they are saying No.


196ddawg 63M
18 posts
3/9/2020 8:11 am

Well I'd never ask untill I was pretty sure I wouldn't get a no but never know


neednewfun50 66M
141 posts
3/9/2020 8:43 am

I said 2 but really it is just 1 the 2nd email is just to thank them for at least responding since so few actually answer you at all


alexsantelmoaff 49M

3/9/2020 7:59 pm

salio mi voto!


fakesrevealed 48M/52F

3/11/2020 5:51 am

Question is, How many times have you said yes...? If that answer is zero or very few, you are most likely here for attention purposes or looking for something you probably won't find anyway.

That being said.....

Men come here for quick hookups or looking for a FWB. Yes its true!

Women are here for more than that. Many are here just for attention, due to lack of it from their spouse or lonelyness, or they are here for a "Relationship", which really isn't what this place is about even though many try to make it that way. Don't get me wrong I'm sure it happens, but its not really what guys are here for.

Now, if you say no or ignore someone before getting to know them, you are most likely in this for attention.

The sad part..... That guy who messaged you has probably messaged several other women in hopes of one taking him up on his offer..... It makes you no one special. I'll never understand why some women don't get that...?

Telling someone "no" shouldn't mean you can't carry on an intelligent conversation with them.


AnewWoman 65F
273 posts
3/11/2020 7:38 am

    Quoting fakesrevealed:
    Question is, How many times have you said yes...? If that answer is zero or very few, you are most likely here for attention purposes or looking for something you probably won't find anyway.

    That being said.....

    Men come here for quick hookups or looking for a FWB. Yes its true!

    Women are here for more than that. Many are here just for attention, due to lack of it from their spouse or lonelyness, or they are here for a "Relationship", which really isn't what this place is about even though many try to make it that way. Don't get me wrong I'm sure it happens, but its not really what guys are here for.

    Now, if you say no or ignore someone before getting to know them, you are most likely in this for attention.

    The sad part..... That guy who messaged you has probably messaged several other women in hopes of one taking him up on his offer..... It makes you no one special. I'll never understand why some women don't get that...?

    Telling someone "no" shouldn't mean you can't carry on an intelligent conversation with them.
"The sad part..... That guy who messaged you has probably messaged several other women in hopes of one taking him up on his offer..... It makes you no one special. I'll never understand why some women don't get that...?"
It makes us no one special in his eyes, what you fail to realize is he is without a doubt, no one special in our eyes. And guess what? It is our eyes that matter, not his. That is what you have failed to understand.


757GAGuy 38M

3/12/2020 7:29 am

Depends on more factors


saggymakesmehard 65M
5 posts
3/16/2020 3:00 pm

Depends on the situation. If people keep contact with me over time (which some do) and we get to know each other better online, I may ask again at a later date--months later, or a year later.


stringtime666 62M
1128 posts
3/19/2020 11:28 am

it depends on the situation, usually a no is enough, but a second attempt has often been worthwhile

Lust was zu schreiben? [post Privater Briefkasten Privat Mailbox (private Mailbox)


Hornycub165 23M

3/19/2020 9:36 pm

No means no soooo


jrkingshow 51M
5279 posts
3/20/2020 2:52 pm

A no is enough... Is something in language i missed? XD


Mrfrogyone1 56M

3/21/2020 4:58 am

Getting a no is a good place to start. If told no, time to move on, but if ignored no way of knowing. So many times I hear of complaining that IM doesnt work, so if ignored on IM I will make repeated attempts. I have seen where someone has read your IM and doesnt respond, seems rude to me, cant be assured that they didnt loose there connection or something. Just trying to be respectful. Im only interested in those interested in me, to chase others sounds desperate and kinda stalkish .... ; )


Steelthunder469 48M

3/24/2020 6:17 am

1 and done


funasianma1e 49M
11551 posts
3/27/2020 9:02 pm

especially in today's MeToo era, once is enough.
Should be once is enough even before.

Your comment has been denied due to the following reason: Banned Topics (hate/weapons/under age)


_IKanCu2_ 105M

3/30/2020 1:04 am

/\/0,,, ][ didn't vote.
/\/0,,, ][ didn't ask .

By (\/)y reasoning and reckoning,,,

][f You can get anyone to tell You the Gods Truth,,,

that would make You a Lion



Tamer
!



HornyOldFucker76 67M

3/30/2020 9:05 am

I voted for "1", but occasionally I'll ask again 2+ months down the road in case she has had a change of heart.


84U269Now 55M

3/31/2020 3:34 pm

Either you are in or out, one no and I move on, I want a real player, not a game player.


Don196207 61M

4/1/2020 2:08 pm

it depends on how well you know her.


Dezzer57 66M
21 posts
4/2/2020 3:19 am

I always accept the first no. However a polite no is better received. No need to be rude on the first time of asking


NJGUY08090 57M
4306 posts
4/3/2020 5:42 pm

I think never taking no as an answer can be bad and turn even creepy for a guy. I'm always nice to people in general. Over the years It has been a blessing and a curse. Some women that I have no interest in have taken being polite as being interested.. For me and the ladies I have made the same mistake myself. I'm always kind and a few have grown up to be hot sexy swans.. I just pays to be nice in the long run and try not to be creepy


bigjohnson12983 53M  
19 posts
4/6/2020 6:59 pm

One and im done


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