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Baby mama drama...
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Baby mama drama... And, I'm the baby mama. Only, the baby in question is eighteen years old and at marine corps boot camp.... Boot Camp Boy's latest letter arrived today! I ripped that sucker open while I was still standing at my mailbox. I can't even begin to describe the what I feel when I see a letter from him. Pride that I have such an honorable young man for a ! Sadness because I miss him so damn much! Joy when he shares his latest skills accomplishments! Shame that I sometimes wish he would fail so he will come back home! Guilt when I go somewhere or experience something fun because he is missing out! Today I felt a hot bed of seething anger! In today's letter Boot Camp Boy said he was disappointed in his dad because he hasn't written him a single letter. Six weeks at boot camp and not one single letter! The part that angers me most is, two weeks ago the Ex Husband and I already got into an argument about this very subject. He told me then he hadn't written any letters and he didn't plan to. I thought I was going to kill him on the spot. "What do you mean you aren't writing him any letters?!? What the fuck is wrong with you???? After everything that HAS DONE FOR YOU over the years the LEAST you can do is WRITE HIM A FUCKING LETTER!!" I had been so mad at that moment that I fully planned on getting in my car and leaving. "Letters from home only make you homesick. I used to hate getting letters from home." "This is [Boot Camp Boy], this isn't you, and he wants a fucking letter from his dad or he wouldn't be asking you for a fucking letter!" I was climbing into my car when the Ex Husband told me he would write him a letter. So, imagine my surprise to read in today's letter that he was disappointed in his dad because he still hasn't sent him any letters. After about a fifteen minute cry this mama caused some drama. I hopped in my car, drove to the ex's, had a screaming fit, clearly tossed aside any ounce of dignity I once had and demanded he write his . I even threw paper and envelopes at him. Ugh I was a raptor ready to tear her prey to shreds. My eyes were narrowed, my lips were curled into a sneer, my hands were balled into fists at my side, and I'm certain if I'd seen myself in the mirror I'd be unrecognizable to even me. The Ex Husband was mad, of course, and walked away from me. For as long as I've known him he has never raised his voice to me. He may say some really terrible, ugly things, but he has never yelled at me or been physical. "I'll write him a letter." He disappeared into the house and I got into my car and left. I really hope he writes that a goddamn letter. I'm a little worried I might just kill my ex if he doesn't. |
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Great Job !! Sometimes people need their cages rattled so they wake up from being comfortably numb all the time !!
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I think that even your x-husband's reasoning, regarding his trips abroad, are in no way valid. Your son is not on a trip abroad. He is in an institutional construct, that is both challenging & oppressive. I just think one has to had have suffered, to really understand. And if he cannot wrap his mind around the thing, he might as well get kicked by mules for an eternity. This makes me think of my dad. When he was alive, he would always take the time to write me, if I was in a fucked up place. But not just me, he would write anyone that he knew was in a fucked up place. I just think this sort of thing matters, tremendously. (You cannot properly gauge the effect you have on people, when they are going through challenging times, and they see someone reach out to them.) But then, my dad road trains across the country, and ate rats in alleys, and survived some fucked up situations. But, in general, he was just a very cool person. I don't like to judge people and I know we have our own unique reasons. ... SL as a velociraptor... 
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I think that even your x-husband's reasoning, regarding his trips abroad, are in no way valid. Your son is not on a trip abroad. He is in an institutional construct, that is both challenging & oppressive. I just think one has to had have suffered, to really understand. And if he cannot wrap his mind around the thing, he might as well get kicked by mules for an eternity. This makes me think of my dad. When he was alive, he would always take the time to write me, if I was in a fucked up place. But not just me, he would write anyone that he knew was in a fucked up place. I just think this sort of thing matters, tremendously. (You cannot properly gauge the effect you have on people, when they are going through challenging times, and they see someone reach out to them.) But then, my dad road trains across the country, and ate rats in alleys, and survived some fucked up situations. But, in general, he was just a very cool person. I don't like to judge people and I know we have our own unique reasons. ... SL as a velociraptor... *. *. *
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Great Job !! Sometimes people need their cages rattled so they wake up from being comfortably numb all the time !!
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Let's hope your ex husband realised that there's no fury like a woman scorned. 
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sorry, don't mean to be judgey but ex sounds like an doofus. i get it, some people are not letter writers but it wouldn't kill to drop a postcard in the mail and a couple of lines of encouragement or thinking of you kiddo will do. my mother lives 10 minutes from me and i write her a letter a couple of times a month just because i know that she like to get letters in the mail. besides the fact that HE may not have liked letters from home, this isn't about him but he sure is making it out to be with some fuck shit excuse; letters from home make you homesick. jesus h. christ.
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IWow BJ, I hope he writes a letter too...the asshole will look funny sporting a new asshole!  I don't blame you for your anger, Mama Bear! My hubs doesn't write cards and letters much for his family either. He always wants me to do it and says "you have better handwriting than I do"...
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My suggestion is if your ex husband does not write a letter for you to take matters into your own hands. Take a card to your ex for him to sign. Inform him you're not leaving until he signs & addresses the card to your son. You mail it. I would inform him you'll be back every week to do the same unless he starts to send cards/letters on his own. If a grown man wants to act like a child he will be treated like a child.
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Your ex is an ass. If your son was younger you could write a letter yourself and sign his name but that probably won't work in this case. I really hope he writes the letter but we can't control what other people do.
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I love letters, but rarely get them. I save hand written notes, they're so personal.
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Even a greeting card with the ex's signature on it, maybe a couple of words, would be better than nothing at all. Seems like the ex has some issues that he's projecting onto Boot Camp Boy. Thank goodness your son doesn't seem to have those same issues!
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Let's hope your ex husband realised that there's no fury like a woman scorned.
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sorry, don't mean to be judgey but ex sounds like an doofus. i get it, some people are not letter writers but it wouldn't kill to drop a postcard in the mail and a couple of lines of encouragement or thinking of you kiddo will do. my mother lives 10 minutes from me and i write her a letter a couple of times a month just because i know that she like to get letters in the mail. besides the fact that HE may not have liked letters from home, this isn't about him but he sure is making it out to be with some fuck shit excuse; letters from home make you homesick. jesus h. christ.
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IWow BJ, I hope he writes a letter too...the asshole will look funny sporting a new asshole! I don't blame you for your anger, Mama Bear! My hubs doesn't write cards and letters much for his family either. He always wants me to do it and says "you have better handwriting than I do"... ~~~" Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift." --Mary Oliver~~~
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My suggestion is if your ex husband does not write a letter for you to take matters into your own hands. Take a card to your ex for him to sign. Inform him you're not leaving until he signs & addresses the card to your son. You mail it. I would inform him you'll be back every week to do the same unless he starts to send cards/letters on his own. If a grown man wants to act like a child he will be treated like a child. Do you have any Primal Urges ... I do, please CUMHANDLEME and explore some of my naughty and nice Primal ... Urges with me !!!
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Your ex is an ass. If your son was younger you could write a letter yourself and sign his name but that probably won't work in this case. I really hope he writes the letter but we can't control what other people do. Elevate me... 
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7/23/2021 4:53 am |
I love letters, but rarely get them. I save hand written notes, they're so personal.
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Even a greeting card with the ex's signature on it, maybe a couple of words, would be better than nothing at all. Seems like the ex has some issues that he's projecting onto Boot Camp Boy. Thank goodness your son doesn't seem to have those same issues! Pagan  Hmmmm....I know I left that wand around here somewhere!
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Clearly, it seems, ex-husband has personal issues much deeper than writing a simple letter to his son. I feel your pain and totally understand your righteous anger. As the old saying goes, you can lead a jackass to water, but you can't make him drink.
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What was his reason for not doing it?
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1 post 7/22/2021 9:28 pm |
Clearly, it seems, ex-husband has personal issues much deeper than writing a simple letter to his son. I feel your pain and totally understand your righteous anger. As the old saying goes, you can lead a jackass to water, but you can't make him drink.
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What was his reason for not doing it?
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And, I'm the baby mama. Only, the baby in question is eighteen years old and at marine corps boot camp.... Boot Camp Boy's latest letter arrived today! I ripped that sucker open while I was still standing at my mailbox. I can't even begin to describe the what I feel when I see a letter from him. Pride that I have such an honorable young man for a son! Sadness because I miss him so damn much! Joy when he shares his latest skills accomplishments! Shame that I sometimes wish he would fail so he will come back home! Guilt when I go somewhere or experience something fun because he is missing out! Today I felt a hot bed of seething anger! In today's letter Boot Camp Boy said he was disappointed in his dad because he hasn't written him a single letter. Six weeks at boot camp and not one single letter! The part that angers me most is, two weeks ago the Ex Husband and I already got into an argument about this very subject. He told me then he hadn't written any letters and he didn't plan to. I thought I was going to kill him on the spot. "What do you mean you aren't writing him any letters?!? What the fuck is wrong with you???? After everything that kid HAS DONE FOR YOU over the years the LEAST you can do is WRITE HIM A FUCKING LETTER!!" I had been so mad at that moment that I fully planned on getting in my car and leaving. "Letters from home only make you homesick. I used to hate getting letters from home." "This is [Boot Camp Boy], this isn't you, and he wants a fucking letter from his dad or he wouldn't be asking you for a fucking letter!" I was climbing into my car when the Ex Husband told me he would write him a letter. So, imagine my surprise to read in today's letter that he was disappointed in his dad because he still hasn't sent him any letters. After about a fifteen minute cry this mama caused some drama. I hopped in my car, drove to the ex's, had a screaming fit, clearly tossed aside any ounce of dignity I once had and demanded he write his son. I even threw paper and envelopes at him. Ugh I was a raptor ready to tear her prey to shreds. My eyes were narrowed, my lips were curled into a sneer, my hands were balled into fists at my side, and I'm certain if I'd seen myself in the mirror I'd be unrecognizable to even me. The Ex Husband was mad, of course, and walked away from me. For as long as I've known him he has never raised his voice to me. He may say some really terrible, ugly things, but he has never yelled at me or been physical. "I'll write him a letter." He disappeared into the house and I got into my car and left. I really hope he writes that kid a goddamn letter. I'm a little worried I might just kill my ex if he doesn't.
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