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Tales from the Plump Side  

secret_lade 49F
14097 posts
12/2/2021 1:39 am
Tales from the Plump Side


The Spawn's birthday package had finally arrived in the mail yesterday.

With her Ulta gift card she had purchased mascara, lip liner, lash serum, and a lip plumping lip gloss.

"Hey Chitlin, your Ulta stuff came today."

"Eeeek! The one day I don't check the mail!!"

She hopped off her bed and snatched the Ulta bubble bag mailer out of my hand. Running into the kitchen, she grabbed the kitchen scissors and annihilated the bag.

"What did you order that your are *that* excited to get??"

Chuckling from the living room, I watching the scene unfold before my very eyes.

"Lip plumper!!"

From inside the bag a clear gloss appeared and on her lips it went.

"Well, you feel 'plumped'?"

"Just because i cursed with thin lips it doesn't mean I have to HAVE thin lips."

"What do you mean 'cursed' with thin lips?? You have my lips."

"Exactly. Need I say more?"

"O Let me try that stuff."

She standing in the bathroom staring at her reflection in the mirror, probably waiting for that magical moment when her lips 'plumped'. Handing the gloss over, I grabbed it out of her hand and applied it to my lips as well.

"I'm feeling something....."

Leaning closer to the mirror, she still scrutinizing to see what she feeling.

"Holy shit! My lips are on fire!! I'm feeling something, alright. I'm feeling like I might need to rip my lips off my face."

"Oh My God Mom.... You're so dramatic."

With an exasperated groan, she rolled her eyes at me as I furiously wiped the gloss away. Not going to lie, there some plumping.... But only because my lips were red and enflamed.

"We can continue the conversation when I can start forming words with my lips again."

With one last frustrated eye roll, she closed the bathroom door with her foot.

"You're not funny Mom!"

"Love you too, Chitlin!!"

I have to say, if it's a choice between thin lips and torture gloss, I'll choose the thin lips....

Happy Thursday!

jamesn 55M
20 posts
12/31/2021 6:38 pm

Big lips are luscious


Unzipmeslowly51x 54M

12/28/2021 4:19 pm

Why do they all want to look the same? Humungous eyebrows and lips. I dont get it. Its like they have a constant look of surprise on tbeir faces😁😁😁ill shut up...i know im old😁😁😁


Vietsalu1978 45M

12/28/2021 1:19 pm

Great! Merry Xmas and happy new year!


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/4/2021 9:08 am

    Quoting CL_Love:
    As soon as you said you put it on, I KNEW this was going to be the result. LOL
If I had read the box, I would have known too! LOL


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/4/2021 9:08 am

    Quoting  :

I haven't really done any smooching in a while, so.... I don't think this will be an issue. Sadly


CL_Love 51M/50F
425 posts
12/3/2021 6:29 am

As soon as you said you put it on, I KNEW this was going to be the result. LOL


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/3/2021 2:09 am

    Quoting  :

Don't get me started on the eyebrows!! LOL My daughter is constantly telling me I'm eyebrow challenged, that I don't have any eyebrows.


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/3/2021 2:06 am

    Quoting exsquid46:
    Ms. secret_lade,

    I have always been a fan of less is more. I think that a woman's natural beauty is all she needs. But to each their own.
I've been on both sides of that spectrum. In my younger days, I wouldn't leave the house unless I had my makeup done. Anymore, I subscribe to the less is more theory. I'm still really good at applying makeup, my daughter is always asking me to do her winged eyeliner, I just don't want to do it on myself anymore.


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/3/2021 12:45 am

LOL Oh my...


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/3/2021 12:45 am

    Quoting MrRareity:
    I'm not a fan of big lips but I'm also not your daughter. Why does she want bigger lips? I'm all with you on this one.
It's because right now the super plump, rounded lip look is in. Definitely not something she would ever be able to achieve. I remember the days when I used to read all the makeup tutorials in cosmo and give them all a try, now they have youtube and tik tok for all that. LOL


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/3/2021 12:34 am

    Quoting pagancountrygirl:
    What in the world was in that lip plumper that made your lips burn? Maybe they should have a warning label on it if it causes that sort of reaction.
I had to grab the box and check it out..... I'm going to write out the marketing word for word.

"So inappropriately intense only a TRUE plumping addict can handle it."

"We pushed the limits to the max & created a lip plumping formula so powerfully effective, it's not for plumping rookies. You'll see and feel a result instantly as the advanced volumizing formula dramatically hydrates, nourishes, & visibly plumps lips instantly, Immediately, & over time."

Directions:

"Note: You may experience a slight to intense tingling. Apply only within perimeter of lips. If applied on skin, a temporary redness will occur. If any discomfort is experienced, immediately remove and discontinue use. Keep away from children."

True story! LOL Most of the box is in French.


exsquid46 64M
640 posts
12/3/2021 12:11 am

Ms. secret_lade,

I have always been a fan of less is more. I think that a woman's natural beauty is all she needs. But to each their own.


lok4fun500 M
51906 posts
12/2/2021 5:04 pm

    Quoting secret_lade:
    Holy cow!! How do you not blow away?
[image]
.....Cum to think of it now, I've never been blown...never mind away!


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/2/2021 4:17 pm

    Quoting boobwhisperer69:
    It's the same stuff they sell to guys to make their dick bigger!!!! And on another note, I know how to kill two birds with one stone!!!!!!!!!! Hmmmmmmmmmmm
Is that so.... Lol


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/2/2021 4:16 pm

    Quoting lonlyforlove2:
    I had to go back and took close at your photo, I don't see anything that needs changing, your lips are fine.. Just appl lightly, maybe your skin needs to get use to this new treatment!!!!
You couldn't pay me enough to use that again! Lol


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/2/2021 4:15 pm

I agree, yes they are!


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/2/2021 4:14 pm

    Quoting Paulxx001:
    Hmmm... interesting
    .. AND educational.
    Now do they sell that stuff for what's dangling between men's legs? 🤔
    *asking for a friend *
Yikes!! Your dangly parts would be on fire, you know.... Lol


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/2/2021 4:10 pm

    Quoting lok4fun500:
    ...You wouldn't be going out here for days as the wind has been howling like a wolf over a rabbit hole.....wind speeds here up to 75mph but higher in other parts.
Holy cow!! How do you not blow away?


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/2/2021 4:09 pm

    Quoting benard69:
    Big lips are way overrated...You can never go out on a windy day...(Smiles)
Omg!! Ha ha ha ha ha


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/2/2021 4:07 pm

    Quoting  :

I have to say, yep, beauty doesn't come easy. Lol


citizen4722 66M  
74582 posts
12/2/2021 3:34 pm

Tip-toe through the two lips....


MrRareity 64M  
4589 posts
12/2/2021 1:37 pm

I'm not a fan of big lips but I'm also not your daughter. Why does she want bigger lips? I'm all with you on this one.

We have two lives, and the second begins when we realise we have only one - Confucious


pagancountrygirl 66F
6466 posts
12/2/2021 10:22 am

What in the world was in that lip plumper that made your lips burn? Maybe they should have a warning label on it if it causes that sort of reaction.

Pagan
Hmmmm....I know I left that wand around here somewhere!


boobwhisperer69 61M  
8322 posts
12/2/2021 10:17 am

It's the same stuff they sell to guys to make their dick bigger!!!! And on another note, I know how to kill two birds with one stone!!!!!!!!!! Hmmmmmmmmmmm


lonlyforlove2 81M
32704 posts
12/2/2021 9:43 am

I had to go back and took close at your photo, I don't see anything that needs changing, your lips are fine.. Just appl lightly, maybe your skin needs to get use to this new treatment!!!!

Stop by at lonlyforlove2
also see Lunch with Lonly , we get snow tomorrow
Check my blog on New Community, "A photo of my big Pecker"
also, " My Sunday afternoon with the kids'


wickedcat2006 49F  
734 posts
12/2/2021 9:33 am

kids are so dramatic,,


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/2/2021 7:44 am

Hmmm... interesting
.. AND educational.
Now do they sell that stuff for what's dangling between men's legs? 🤔
*asking for a friend *


lok4fun500 M
51906 posts
12/2/2021 7:02 am

...You wouldn't be going out here for days as the wind has been howling like a wolf over a rabbit hole.....wind speeds here up to 75mph but higher in other parts.


benard69 66M/66F  

12/2/2021 5:54 am

Big lips are way overrated...You can never go out on a windy day...(Smiles)


G000dbuddy 36M
1676 posts
12/2/2021 4:59 am

Thank you

goodbuddy781


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/2/2021 4:51 am

    Quoting mc_justmc:
    I know some thin lipped women, yours are normal.
Thank you! I thought they were too... my daughter is a real confidence killer!


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/2/2021 4:50 am

    Quoting Weeload2:
    That's funny. If you looked up and seen the bat signal in the sky, there might be rescue from the burning on it's way ! lol
I just looked up.... no bat signal. Lol


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/2/2021 4:49 am

    Quoting staci_19702:
    🤣🤣🤣
    I have to say, I can totally relate to this one!
That stuff can be used as an implemented tool of torture!!


mc_justmc 63M

12/2/2021 4:18 am

I know some thin lipped women, yours are normal.


Weeload2 60M
1104 posts
12/2/2021 3:42 am

That's funny. If you looked up and seen the bat signal in the sky, there might be rescue from the burning on it's way ! lol

𝕋𝕙𝕒𝕟𝕜𝕤 𝕗𝕠𝕣 𝕓𝕖𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕪𝕠𝕦


staci_19702 53T
3767 posts
12/2/2021 3:25 am

🤣🤣🤣
I have to say, I can totally relate to this one!

Have a great day! 💋
Staci


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
12/2/2021 1:40 am

The Spawn's birthday package had finally arrived in the mail yesterday.

With her Ulta gift card she had purchased mascara, lip liner, lash serum, and a lip plumping lip gloss.

"Hey Chitlin, your Ulta stuff came today."

"Eeeek! The one day I don't check the mail!!"

She hopped off her bed and snatched the Ulta bubble bag mailer out of my hand. Running into the kitchen, she grabbed the kitchen scissors and annihilated the bag.

"What did you order that your are *that* excited to get??"

Chuckling from the living room, I was watching the scene unfold before my very eyes.

"Lip plumper!!"

From inside the bag a clear gloss appeared and on her lips it went.

"Well, you feel 'plumped'?"

"Just because i was cursed with thin lips it doesn't mean I have to HAVE thin lips."

"What do you mean 'cursed' with thin lips?? You have my lips."

"Exactly. Need I say more?"

"Ok. Let me try that stuff."

She was standing in the bathroom staring at her reflection in the mirror, probably waiting for that magical moment when her lips 'plumped'. Handing the gloss over, I grabbed it out of her hand and applied it to my lips as well.

"I'm feeling something....."

Leaning closer to the mirror, she was still scrutinizing to see what she was feeling.

"Holy shit! My lips are on fire!! I'm feeling something, alright. I'm feeling like I might need to rip my lips off my face."

"Oh My God Mom.... You're so dramatic."

With an exasperated groan, she rolled her eyes at me as I furiously wiped the gloss away. Not going to lie, there was some plumping.... But only because my lips were red and enflamed.

"We can continue the conversation when I can start forming words with my lips again."

With one last frustrated eye roll, she closed the bathroom door with her foot.

"You're not funny Mom!"

"Love you too, Chitlin!!"

I have to say, if it's a choice between thin lips and torture gloss, I'll choose the thin lips....

Happy Thursday!


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