It really fills you up!  

GratefulGirl69 52F
1489 posts
5/29/2018 3:34 pm
It really fills you up!

It's time to lighten things up, sexy friends!

Given recent circumstances, I'm currently undersexed. Well, that's not accurate, as that would imply that I am getting at least some sex. But unless you count activities involving only yourself and a device that runs on batteries, I am not.

My brain doesn't like when I'm not having sex. It does weird things when I'm in this condition... I'll see something that will trigger a naughty thought, and then my mind will wander off in bizarre directions, tracing that thought down strange- and often humorous- avenues. It leads to things like not accelerating at a green light until someone honks at me... or standing and daydreaming, looking at something on the shelves at Walmart.

Something like this:

Cock soup? Really?


Of course, I know perfectly well that it's the product of an epic translation fail; I've seen tons of similar things on Buzzfeed. I've just never seen one in real life, and it definitely sent me into one of those daydreamy, space cadet moments in the aisle of Wally World the other day.

I found myself wondering what it would be like if there were products that we could consume that could produce certain effects, as implied by the label...

We focus so much on technology when it comes to substitutes for actual intimate activity with actual human beings- going all the way back to the Orgasmatron from Woody Allen's Sleeper to the more contemporary Ex Machina and my beloved Westworld (or Her for the emotional connection, instead of the physical one)... from the common sex toys that we are all familiar with to emerging VR devices and these new Japanese sex dolls...

... It seems to be part of the modern human experience to carve out a slice of technological advancement to develop ways to achieve sexual (or emotional) satisfaction without the participation of another human.

But maybe we're over-complicating things by going down that path. Maybe a better strategy, a better R & D project, would be to develop substances that could, upon consumption, get our brains spurting out all of those joyful little chemicals that produce- or are produced by- sexual stimulation and release.

Since it's all in the brain anyway, maybe there could be something that one could ingest that would waken and electrify nerves and muscles, initiating a sort of "trip" of physio-neurological stimulation that would build up and ultimately result in climax... a sort of stimulation simulation.

Maybe it could be a pill or a lozenge... or perhaps a soup. Like Cock Soup. Or... a Pussy Protein Bar... or an Ass Shake. A supplement for good sexual health for those who can't find- or simply don't want- all of the complications that come with dealing with other messy, living beings.

Standing in Walmart and contemplating such a thing, my mind wandered towards what the ad campaigns might be for such products. It strayed a bit on the old SNL "Schweddy Balls" routine, an ultimate classic in suggestive sexual punnery, recalled the short-lived commercial for the topical pain medication: "You bet your sweet Assspercream," and tried to come up with something original for the product in front of me.

The best I could come up with was the subject of this post, "It really fills you up!"

I know, I know- definitely face palm worthy!

But how about you, sexy folks? What would be a good tagline, commercial, or advertising strategy for a Cock Soup that actually simulated cock? And not the kind that crows at dawn.

Have fun!


GratefulGirl69 52F

5/29/2018 3:42 pm

For the record, I do prefer the messy, complicated stuff that involves another actual human being. Though a bowl of this might be okay now and again...

JackDotGrisham 38M
11 posts
5/29/2018 4:15 pm

Wow so funny

GratefulGirl69 replies on 5/29/2018 5:56 pm:
Thank you!

ironman2769 56M  
12877 posts
5/29/2018 4:22 pm

I am not so sure I need something to stimulate my mind like this.....

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GratefulGirl69 replies on 5/29/2018 5:56 pm:
You do just fine without the dietary supplement?

Thanks for stopping by!

itsabouttime1965 55M
3 posts
5/29/2018 4:28 pm


GratefulGirl69 replies on 5/29/2018 5:55 pm:

Leegs2012 48M
87211 posts
5/29/2018 6:24 pm

LOL! What they come up with!!

movesinmd 57M
54 posts
5/29/2018 6:30 pm

OK Grateful, I'll supply the Weiner, you supply the Buns.

redrockrascal 63M
23354 posts
5/29/2018 6:41 pm

I know there is a smart assed response to this but it ain't coming to me. So I guess I'll have to paraphrase the Soup Nazzi "No soup for me".

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.

gootman4u 61M
34 posts
5/29/2018 7:35 pm

Hello.. say hello sometime...

GratefulGirl69 replies on 5/29/2018 7:56 pm:
Hello sometime!

lok4fun500 111M  
51056 posts
5/29/2018 7:57 pm

Cock soup?? I might have to try makin that someday! Trust Walmart to have what it needs.
My right hand gets a workout every once in a while and NO batteries needed!
My cock is frazzled!

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citizen4722 63M  
73569 posts
5/30/2018 12:48 pm

Definitely food for thought

lindoboy100 58M
23889 posts
5/30/2018 1:44 pm

Cheese-us McGG, we've been daein' Cockaleekie soup for ever, this is auld. Just like the golf n the Television n the phone, we invented the soup likes!! Ye need tae come tae the land ay tartan for the latest in technological developments. Wur cocks are very average mind!!

MDguy1960x 61M  
49 posts
6/1/2018 6:21 am

Cock Soup - for women who need a hard-y meal after work

GratefulGirl69 replies on 6/2/2018 1:26 am:
That;s good- I like it!! Thank you!

isitbreaktime2 55M

6/3/2018 3:11 am

How about: "Play with your food!"

ranchomongo 68M  
5596 posts
6/6/2018 3:17 pm

LOL.. I like to watch Andrew Zimmern's Bizzarre Foods, seems Andrew eats penis soup a few times on different shows.. Says it s "chewy". and crunchy taste in the same soup? Hope you enjoy your feast. LOL


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isitbreaktime2 55M

6/7/2018 3:19 pm

"Cock Soup--remember to swallow!"

GratefulGirl69 replies on 6/8/2018 5:49 pm:
LOL LOL You're so good! Good at being bad...

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