Red_Elf 48F  
602 posts
6/11/2017 12:28 pm

So, Mr. I-don't-believe-in-evolution sent me a message after the fact, "So does this mean no more good sex???"

Wait...what? The guy...okay...he did feel pretty good...but I'd been telling him I needed sex to go a lot longer before I'd feel satisfied...and he just kept cumming way too soon...maybe it's plenty for some people...but NOT FOR ME! Not only that, he really didn't put in much effort to make sure i came...which meant I didn't. I figured it was good enough that I could work with it...but it was by NO MEANS "good" sex. it was okay sex that could possibly get better with MORE EFFORT on his part.

What exactly did he think was in it for me to continue the sexual aspect of our relationship if the rest wasn't working out?

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itsallfantasy 55F  
1080 posts
6/11/2017 1:00 pm

Guys fail to realize that MEN can ejaculate almost instantly, but for women to reach an orgasm it takes LONGER THAN THAT!! Women and men's bodies are NOT the same and guys have to stop thinking that because they ejaculated a woman is satisfied. That was maybe the thinking in the early 1600's, but it isn't now.

NOT ALL MEN ARE LIKE THIS - BUT TOO MANY ARE!!! I have heard and seen enough posts on "OHHH I can rock your world" and it is really they rock their world and got what they wanted and to hell with us.

ProfPlayful 58M
3861 posts
6/11/2017 3:50 pm

You deserve a man who can satisfy you, whatever your needs may be. If he can't last long enough then he should make endurance a priority.

Let him find his "good sex" with somebody else. You need great sex.

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sweetblack_luvva 44M
71 posts
6/11/2017 4:07 pm

in that case he needs to become more creative.. and maybe you can even suggest things that really turns you on, coax him into pleasuring you instead of just pleasuring himself.. he probably did it that way before and it was good for an ex partner that he may have had. Many of us men fail to realise that what works for one woman may not work for another because y'all respond differently. so I think it's just a matter of getting him to pay attention to you rather than pay attention to himself alone..So I think you should work with him since you said he has potential and coax him into being the lover you believe that he could be..All the best because sex is such a beautiful thing when both parties are connected..

Red_Elf replies on 6/11/2017 4:18 pm:
Yeah, the part you missed is that I broke it off with him because of red flags. He was far too big of a project, doesn't believe in evolution, even though I'm a science teacher, is believes in a bunch of conspiracy theories, and I was starting to think he may have some insecurity problems...after that, he wanted to have some kind of post break up sex, because he thought it was great sex.

I kept telling him I needed more. He wasn't getting it.

So, no, not worth the time of day.

clittywhisperer1 57M
1415 posts
6/11/2017 5:19 pm

what? women can cum from sex with a man? when the hell did this happen? when did a woman let a man touch her naked without a burning bed of coals to cross? LOL just being sarcastic. half of all men are in the bottom half and the top half also has a bottom half which is not so great .the odds are not great that after all the filtering and subjective decision making you will find a gem . you will never find a ruby in a mountain of rocks ,and there ain't no coupe deville in the bottom of a crackerjack box . to catch big fish cast a wide net .

Red_Elf replies on 6/11/2017 6:53 pm:
Pretty sure my net is wide

Resident_Bitch 104M/104F  
9160 posts
6/12/2017 6:35 am

Thinking about it, I don't think I've ever met a guy on THIS site who was any good at pleasing.....but I guess, at least a few have said 'sorry'....then one who indicated I was frigid......
Yeh, I think I NEED vanilla dating, at least on their they make an effort in many aspects....

....whilst here, it's not sex site but more like selfish site.....

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Red_Elf replies on 6/12/2017 4:55 pm:
ROFL...the guys I've met from this site generally know what they are doing. That guy I picked up from the fishy site.

27112 posts
6/12/2017 7:35 pm

    Quoting ProfPlayful:
    You deserve a man who can satisfy you, whatever your needs may be. If he can't last long enough then he should make endurance a priority.

    Let him find his "good sex" with somebody else. You need great sex.
I feel sorry for any man that equates your definition (clarified by you response to a question) as "good sex" and I think you've already determined this guy has no "staying power" (pun intended).

I agree with Prof playful, that there is nothing to be gained with this guy, and that it's a mistake to settle for less than you deserve or want.

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discreteSteve62 52M
2174 posts
6/23/2017 3:21 am

Part of the fun for me is making sure my partner has fun too. That's one of the reasons I love giving oral; just about every woman I've been able to do it with has enjoyed it a lot. I don't usually want to stop once she comes, I want to keep going until she doesn't want any more oral, and wants my cock inside. At that point, it's possible that she might come again from penetration, but it's OK if she doesn't, because she's already had her share; an orgasm while I'm inside is a bonus rather than her only chance. So, even if I happen to be a minuteman by that point, it's not a problem.

But when oral is off the menu (as happens certain times of the month), self-control is a good thing. Unless my wife tells me, "Just for you this time," I can hold back until she's had her turn. That's just the right way to do things, for her pleasure, for my satisfaction at pleasing her, and for the benefit of being welcomed back for more later.

It puzzles me that some guys don't think that way, even if only for the possibility of more later.

Rather than a digression above about other reasons I love giving oral, here's more. In addition to enjoying how it almost always works for a partner, I like how it allows me to concentrate on my partner's pleasure, rather than dividing attention between mine and hers. I like the physical sensations I feel: the touch, the scent, the close-up look, the taste (sometimes), and the sounds. I like the way a well-pleased partner is more likely to be a partner who wants more later. And I like how a well-licked woman feels when I have the privilege of the sex act that typically follows oral.

Red_Elf replies on 6/23/2017 5:31 am:
First of all--introducing Softcups...your woman needs these things RIGHT NOW for period sex.

Secondly, there are plenty of things other than oral that can be done to stimulate a woman. The fact this guy didnt out much effort in on any of it is ludicrous. He just wasn't taking care of me.

Finally, there's a hottie I've been with recently who has been overmedicated because allergies or a cold has been slowing him down. He's had a bit of trouble staying hard because of it. That dude STILL makes sure I get well over two solid hours of sexual play out of him...even when his work day didn't end until after 11 pm and he had to be up at 5 am!

Some people are just sexually selfish.

discreteSteve62 52M
2174 posts
6/24/2017 1:46 am

First of all--introducing Softcups...your woman needs these things RIGHT NOW for period sex.

I will suggest the idea, or maybe just buy it for her for a random no-occasion gift occasion.

I know that there are plenty of ways to please a woman besides oral. For my wife, there are certain p-in-v moves that really work for her. Breast play works for a lot of women, but only occasionally for my wife. Various foreplay moves are good for getting her into the mood (not that it takes much), but they're much more for stimulating the mood than for getting further into the action. With a different partner, I'd have to learn new moves, or maybe just a new mix of old moves. But I know pretty well what works for her -- and I enjoy all of it.

I haven't had erection problems; at worst it's been slow to start but fine once started. But I know plenty of things to do if that happens.

It would be interesting to try some really long sessions now and then. Usually my wife reaches a point where further stimulation starts to feel like tickle torture (not exactly, but some sort of too much of a good thing), so when that happens she needs a break or a switch to something else. But there's only so much time in a day, and we have to allow a certain amount for things like food and sleep.

Red_Elf replies on 6/24/2017 6:39 am:
I haven't ever had more than 3 straight hours of continuous play. In that case, regardless of which man I was with--or men, as was the case a couple of times, they wear out. There were a couple of those occasions I could have kept going. Only once when it was an MFM that I think I may have been only a little disappointed, but not in a significant sense.

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