Confessions of a Satyrist
 
Time to retire the character I created to head up this blog, and just be me.
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Secret Message Central
Posted:Dec 19, 2015 8:59 am
Last Updated:Nov 21, 2020 5:19 am
16783 Views

Go ahead, whisper in my ear.

This is another great idea that I have stolen from other members! I can't read your email, but I can read blogs and enjoy doing so!

If you have something to tell me, comment here. It'll just be our little secret, okay?
1 comment , 3 Pending
I admit it, I got sucked in
Posted:Jan 18, 2020 11:46 am
Last Updated:Nov 29, 2021 3:16 pm
3023 Views

There are so many dating/hookup/social sites out there these days that one has difficulty deciding where to go, if at all. I'm getting disillusioned with this place, between people I like just vanishing, along with vanishing words and characters in posts, I'm not sure I want to invest here anymore.

So, I went looking for other sites to browse and possibly join. My ideal site would be like this one, hot people along with not so hot people who are really nice, a blog area, and a magazine area to read and post erotica.

Sadly, those are far and few between. I decided I could live without the blog area (I'm already blogging on three sites as it is) and one site seemed to have a lot of action. So I joined it.

Bad move, Larry. (<-- Obscure reference to an old computer game.)

What could a twenty-something possibly want from an old...er...sexy senior citizen? Credit card numbers. I tend to be an early riser, and the most message action I get from PYTs is in the overnight hours.

RED FLAG NUMBER ONE: They're not 20-somethings, they're probably middle-age, balding men running a normal daytime work schedule in eastern Europe. Funny how their quitting time corresponds to our normal workday, when the come-on messages all stop.

RED FLAG NUMBER TWO: The old "My old boyfriend is stalking me so I can't post my pictures up here for you" gag. Uh-huh. Sure. Next I suppose you're going to invite me to another site? Them: "My pictures are posted on a site you can join (insert web here)." A little snooping around shows those sites are in China or Eastern Europe.

Uh, no. I may have fallen off the turnip truck, but not yesterday.

Of course, once the Internet knows one is out nosing around dating sites, suddenly one's inbox fills up with all kinds of solicitations. Some of the sites are obvious ripoffs, some mask their ripoff tactics quite well so you don't know you've been scammed until you've been scammed, and others are legitimate sites where people are marriage minded and not a FWB can be found.

So, I'll just tell my credit card company to reject any further transactions from that hookup provider and try again somewhere else.
0 Comments
I admit it, I got sucked in
Posted:Jan 18, 2020 6:06 am
Last Updated:Nov 29, 2021 3:16 pm
2998 Views

There are so many dating/hookup/social sites there these days that one has difficulty deciding where to go, if at all. I'm getting disillusioned with this place, between people I like just vanishing, along with vanishing words and characters in posts, I'm not sure I want to invest here anymore.

So, I went looking for other sites to browse and possibly join. My ideal site would be like this one, people along with not so people are really nice, a blog area, and a magazine area to read and post erotica.

Sadly, those are far and few between. I decided I could live without the blog area (I'm already blogging on three sites as it is) and one site seemed to have a lot of action. So I joined it.

Bad move, Larry. (<-- Obscure reference to an old computer game.)

What could a twenty-something possibly want from an old...er...sexy senior citizen? Credit card numbers. I tend to be an early riser, and the most action I get from PYTs is in the overnight hours.

RED FLAG ONE: They're not 20-somethings, they're probably middle-age, balding men running a normal daytime work schedule in eastern Europe. Funny how their quitting time corresponds to our normal workday, when the come-on messages all stop.

RED FLAG TWO: The old "My old boyfriend is stalking me so I can't post my pictures up here for you" gag. Uh-huh. Sure. Next I suppose you're going to invite me to another site? Them: "My pictures are posted on a site you can join (insert web here)." A little snooping around shows those sites are in China or Eastern Europe.

Uh, no. I may have fallen off the turnip truck, but not yesterday.

Of course, once the Internet knows one is nosing around dating sites, suddenly one's inbox fills up with all kinds of solicitations. Some of the sites are obvious ripoffs, some mask their ripoff tactics quite well so you don't know you've been scammed until you've been scammed, and others are legitimate sites where people are marriage minded and not a FWB can be found.

So, I'll just tell my credit card company to reject any further transactions from that hookup provider and try again somewhere else.
0 Comments
New Year New Starts - Sort Of
Posted:Jan 8, 2020 6:18 am
Last Updated:Nov 29, 2021 3:16 pm
2970 Views

It seems like most bloggers write a New Years post, I'm just a little late with mine. Too much going on around here the last few days with -of-town guests and family obligations. It's true, you can pick your friends but you can't pick your relatives.

Anyway, I'm back to work on legitimate novel instead of writing the erotica I always planned post up here, but haven't. This site drops characters, words and sometimes entire clauses. I hate editing and cutting up stuff as it is but having a 'bot or bad editor do it for is just too much.

Last year, [blog SassyGigi] asked if anyone had started the new year with a good jump. I didn't, and I didn't start this year way, either, although I did have a strange encounter END last year. I'd write about it, but I wouldn't want the guilty party read review of our encounter and have her take it personally. Not it matters, she was really weird.

I need a regular. Maybe I'll make retro-New Years' Resolution.,
0 Comments
Another Missing Character or Seven
Posted:Dec 10, 2019 12:26 pm
Last Updated:Sep 28, 2020 6:01 am
3510 Views

Has anyone else made note of the fact charac and words tend just vanish from around here?

This makes it tough read when words just out.

Crummy editing software, I take it.
5 Comments
Time Flies Like an Arrow
Posted:Oct 21, 2019 9:10 am
Last Updated:Sep 28, 2020 6:01 am
3559 Views
Fruit flies like a banana.

So said Groucho Marx, and he was right, time does fly like an arrow.

I read a headline today that said Ursula Andress turned 83 today. 83? Seriously? How can Honey Ryder be that old? When Dr. No hit the movie screens in 1962, the Swedish sex goddess was only 26 years old. I was young enough that I couldn't get into the theater to see Dr. No, but old enough to experience rocket hardness when I saw the promo photos in magazine articles.

And like every other pre- and teenage boy, I was instantly in lust with the James Bond sex goddess. Also like every teenage boy (and probably middle aged fathers) armed with publicity photos, I would head to my secret place to have another fantasy-laced session of masturbation that centered around Ursula Andress.



When I was in college, I had a part time job in a retail store. I arranged my class schedule to mesh with my store duties. One of my morning tasks was to take the bank deposit across the parking lot to the local ban I was shocked the first morning meet a teller who was the spit and image of Ursula Andress! I was instantly in lust with the young woman, she had blonde hair that she wore in the same style as Hone Ryder, she wore heavy makeup that resembled Honey Ryder and an electric smile that gave me an instant hard-on. After that first meeting, I had walk back the store carefully, and with a few minutes to spare before the store opened, I went back to the rest room to relieve myself. Ah, to be twenty again and be perpetually horny and ready for action.

My new crush was probably 5 or 6 years older than me. That doesn't seem like a big deal now but was very important to a 25 year old beauty who wasn't interested in a "." After a few deposits at her window, I mustered up the courage to tell her she looked just like Ursula Andress. She shook her head and denied it but did thank me for the compliment.

Of course, with that statement, she knew of my crush and from then on, pretty much ignored me.

There was no hope for me every getting a date with Ursula Andress, and no chance for a date with the Ursula Andress lookalike.

And now she's 83. Ursula Andress is 83. I have no idea about the teller I haven't seen in 45 years. The real Ursula is still beautiful at 83. Ah, but Honey Ryder is perpetually 26 and still gives me that stirring down below.

I'm shaken and part of me is certainly stirred.
1 comment
Do you ever question yourself?
Posted:Sep 18, 2019 8:34 pm
Last Updated:Jan 7, 2020 8:24 am
3640 Views

Like, why am I here?

Tonight is one of those nights.
3 Comments

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