⎝🔴⎞ ⎝🔴⎞ ⎝🔴⎞ Is it funny to you?  

pal334 67M  
52299 posts
9/14/2020 5:56 am

Last Read:
9/15/2020 4:10 pm

⎝🔴⎞ ⎝🔴⎞ ⎝🔴⎞ Is it funny to you?


Here is an oldie but a goody. I posted it a while back. A few folks were not happy about it, but I readily admit that I find it funny. Is this funny you? Are there any other occupations that strike you as funny.

Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?

A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.

Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?

A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No..
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
ATTORNEY: She had , right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?


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pal334 67M  
45069 posts
9/14/2020 5:57 am

LAWYER: Now sir, I'm sure you are an intelligent and honest man--

WITNESS: Thank you. If I weren't under oath, I'd return the compliment.



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SimpleLatina 57F
3380 posts
9/14/2020 7:02 am

Lawyers always seem to be funny


rdy2try4 56F  
3304 posts
9/14/2020 7:34 am

Believe it or not, true story here, Dr. Vincent J. M. Di Maio, a major expert in ballistics and a forensic pathologist, WAS asked questions similar to this. I sat there in total shock as the defense lawyer asked him seriously how many of his patients were dead and he answered all of them. As a forensic pathologist yes, he looks at dead bodies and the lawyer should have known this. I didn't hear this second hand. I was watching the trial and saw it with my own two eyes. Way back when he started I am sure he did work on live people, but he was the chief medical examiner for San Antonio, Texas for about 40 years.


author51 58F  
126353 posts
9/14/2020 7:46 am

PAL...It was so Hilarious that I spit my coffee onto my screen and laughed out loud.......Thank you for making my day with these jokes.....xoxo


donsv1962 59M

9/14/2020 8:12 am

LOL!

I want to take you into the fiery lair of steamy sexual delight on this hot sultry night.


Tmptrzz 59F  
104421 posts
9/14/2020 9:14 am

Good morning Pal, these were great thanks for the laughs.. And I hope your Monday is a great start to your week..

Seduce the mind and see what a wonderful adventure the body will take you on..


sweet_VM 63F
81575 posts
9/14/2020 10:24 pm

It was a good one hugs V

Become a blog watcher sweet_vm


pal334 67M  
45069 posts
9/15/2020 4:04 pm

Funny and scary

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pal334 67M  
45069 posts
9/15/2020 4:06 pm

    Quoting rdy2try4:
    Believe it or not, true story here, Dr. Vincent J. M. Di Maio, a major expert in ballistics and a forensic pathologist, WAS asked questions similar to this. I sat there in total shock as the defense lawyer asked him seriously how many of his patients were dead and he answered all of them. As a forensic pathologist yes, he looks at dead bodies and the lawyer should have known this. I didn't hear this second hand. I was watching the trial and saw it with my own two eyes. Way back when he started I am sure he did work on live people, but he was the chief medical examiner for San Antonio, Texas for about 40 years.
That is similar indeed

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pal334 67M  
45069 posts
9/15/2020 4:07 pm

    Quoting author51:
    PAL...It was so Hilarious that I spit my coffee onto my screen and laughed out loud.......Thank you for making my day with these jokes.....xoxo
Bingo! It worked well

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pal334 67M  
45069 posts
9/15/2020 4:08 pm

Got ya

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pal334 67M  
45069 posts
9/15/2020 4:09 pm

    Quoting Tmptrzz:
    Good morning Pal, these were great thanks for the laughs.. And I hope your Monday is a great start to your week..
Always a good way to start a day

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pal334 67M  
45069 posts
9/15/2020 4:10 pm

    Quoting sweet_VM:
    It was a good one hugs V
Perfect

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