Why is it so hard for a girl with cum on her chin to get laid?  

rm_highbrowkink 48M/48F
86 posts
9/19/2010 8:10 am
Why is it so hard for a girl with cum on her chin to get laid?

Long time no blog post … sorry about that. Pedro is suffering from overwork and writer's block, so I am going to try my hand at this. Bear with me, Pedro is the wittier half – I just exist to have sex.

So, I know that the title of this post is probably gonna get me in tons of trouble with people who already offered, but … the logistics of this are really befuddling to me.

When I first got on this site, so many people's profiles said that applicants must “be real.” I was very confused. When one starts down the slippery slope of philosophy and the state of existence, you never know where you will end up. I think, therefore I am? So I'm real, right? Are there people who read this who are not real? How does that work? Am I real enough? Am I a figment of my own imagination, or of someone else's? If this whole site is imaginary, am I imagining the request to “be real?” Worse, if it is imaginary, then a lot of imaginary people are going to be sorely disappointed by the lack of real people. Ouch – I think I just hurt my brain.

Sidebar: here I am laying in bed naked and writing, and Pedro must resist the urge to look. I don't like people reading over my shoulder while I'm trying to be creative, and what is attracting him is not my naked body, but what I am writing. I don't think that says so much about my naked bod as about what a freak I married.

Back on message: So, no longer an TSdates.com virgin, I begin to understand. Apparently there is a whole fetish of people who like to see if they can get you interested, but have no intention of putting out. Hmmm … almost makes furries sound sane. At least furries will put out.

In the 3 months we have been on this site we have corresponded with and “found” about 8 compatible couples. We have successfully completed a date with one. Not for lack of trying. Sample e-mail exchange:

Them: Hiya! Can we hit you up?

Us: Yes, yes you may. Do you understand our ground rules?

Them: Sounds great to us! When you want to get funky?

Us: We will have a sitter available the third Sunday after the next full moon...

Them: E-mail us – we can't wait to have sex.

Us: Scheduled cleared – let's have sex!

Us: Ummm … guess the first e-mail did not go through: Schedule cleared – let's have sex!

Us: Soooo … Date time is in 24 hours, haven't heard from you. Let's have sex?

Our conversation then turns to “Now what do we do?” We've been building up anticipation of our date for more than 3 weeks and now we want to get freaky! The anticipation has kept us horny and enjoying each other for a couple of weeks, but after eating very good meat and potatoes all week, we are ready for some pasta!

Well, we have a bunch of wonderful contacts out of town, but 24 hours notice is not enough warning time, plus we had not made arrangements to cover a long drive.

So, what's available on short notice? Penis! I like penis. There is lots of penis on this site, it's always waving at me. This should be easy, right?

Let's look back through our e-mail and see who has expressed an interest. Hmmm … this one sounds nice and may be available, never hurts to ask … Oh! Look! This one is “Online Now!” I'll just send a flirt and a quick e-mail and we will be getting lucky in no time! Hello? Hel-lo--oo? Dude, I've waved at you like 4 times in the past hour. Still says you are online … Hey! Hey! … Sigh.

Let's take a moment to study social structure. Setting aside our own individual feelings of self-worth, sex, like most things in life, is governed by the principal of supply and demand. Those who have it rank higher than those who want it. At the top of the TSdates.com social structure are single women – the rarest of creatures and the most sought after. Almost all the men on the site want them, and so do half the women – regardless if the wanters are singles or couples. The law of supply and demand governs that these women get what they want and the petitioners must bend over backward to present the princess with the best offer to attract her attention away from the others.

Next are couples where the women are willing to accommodate additional males. That, as it happens, would be us.

Next are couples who want only women or other couples – they demand rarer items and therefore there is less supply to meet their needs.

Finally, and I do sympathize with your pain, are the single males. I have corresponded with lots of handsome, smart, gifted men on this site; each deserves his own individual attention and a good, mind blowing fuck. Also, there are a lot of other guys on this site. Sadly, even if I were a nymphomaniac housewife with 2 hour slots available every day of the week, I don't think I could accommodate you all; a compromise must be reached.

Given that we are only available on 3rd Sundays after a full moon, we will have to take you in groups of 3 or more. Everybody on the same page here? Objections? No? Good.

So, here we are at 6 PM on a Saturday. Only one option left...the dreaded chat page (Da … Da … Da … Dum!) The system is clunky and crashes regularly. Everybody says hi at once, leaving my poor little brain to keep track of 4 or more conversations at the same time. Hope we can keep straight what we were talking about with whom! On our first outing, we talked with 5 single males who were also resorting to chat on a Saturday night.

  • Number One – booked! Ta-da! But in the interest of helping out our single male friends and justifying the cost of the hotel room, let's invite a couple more.
  • Number Two – after many valuable minutes of discussion, decides that he may not be comfortable with that many men in the room. No, “thanks for your time,” only a “has left the chat room.”
  • Number Three – “ OK, but only if she wears red underwear and handcuffs while abusing herself with a dildo.” (Hello, there are supposed to be 4 penises in this room, what do I need with a dildo?)
  • Number Four – “Really? A girl wants to have sex with me? You want me to do what? Maybe … I can't handle this. Can I call you later?”
  • Number Five - “O.K. Sure. Wait. This is too good to be true! You can't be real! What is she doing right now? Can you text me a pic of what she is doing right now? Oh. OK. Sure. Be there in 20 minutes.” Guess what? No Show!

    Turns out, I should have stopped at Number One. You know who you are. Thanks for a good time, look forward to more.

  • xxladyloverxxxx 42M
    2 posts
    9/19/2010 8:52 am

    dont worry youlook very sexy with spuk o your chin lol

    rm_Buck_U_ 55M
    86 posts
    9/20/2010 5:12 am

    Timing is everything in the "real world" Distance and scheduling are always the tough hurdles to overcum. Being one of the millions of single guys, I know your pain in the scheduling fiasco. When it DOES work out, it will be GREAT!

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