It's a quiet Sunday evening....  

secret_lade 47F
14021 posts
9/26/2021 4:56 pm
It's a quiet Sunday evening....


The Ex Husband helped me move a truck load of boxes to the house today, only one more to go.

What an ordeal.

I can honestly say, this moving thing sucks.

The day before my Marine left for boot camp he had packed up all of his stuff and put it in a giant tote for safe keeping and slide it into a closet, out of the way. The tote emerged today and I immediately got weepy just seeing it, and knowing what was inside.

"Do you want me to keep this at my house? I can just slide it into a crawl space until he gets back."

That will be four years at the minimum....

"Ok. He's got some really expensive gaming equipment in there. Really expensive...."

"It'll be ok. I'm going to take it right into the house as soon as I get home, it's not going to sit outside and get rained on or anything."

"Ok, keep it safe."

He opened the lid to the tote to take a peek at what was inside, his cap and gown caught me immediately off guard. I could still see his smiling face wearing that cap and gown, handing me a yellow carnation.

"Here you go Ma, this is for you."

Not going to lie, I still feel like a piece of me is missing without my Marine around, but it's getting easier to accept and move forward. It sure hurt like hell to watch that tote leave, though, on the back of the Ex Husband's truck. It almost felt like I was losing him all over again....

We are all feeling the loss, though.

My Oldest had called me up Friday night and wanted to talk.

A little unusual for him....

During the course of the conversation he had asked me if I'd heard from the Marine. My heart went out to him. He asked me if I would tell the Marine next time I hear from him that he misses him and loves him.

I said I would.

I listened to my Oldest cry on the other end of the phone for the first time in quite a few years.

He was missing his brother.

Up until that point I had always been the basket case, crying every time I turned around. It didn't occur to me that others were only keeping it together because they knew I could not.

And now that I'm getting stronger....

It's their turn to come to me for comfort. To release their own emotions.

I surely do miss my Marine, my Middle , but life is slowly moving forward and good changes are happening. I hope the good changes are happening for him as well.

Happy Sunday!

lindoboy100 58M
23884 posts
9/28/2021 4:11 am

    Quoting secret_lade:
    What is the first most stressful even?
It seems that bereavement, loss of a loved one, is the most stressful, not surprisingly. Divorce figures high on the list too.

Funnily enough, moving house comes high on the list of happy life events.

Life is good McLade!

Nada más que fallas......


MrWrong4RghtNow 55M  
2187 posts
9/28/2021 12:10 am

It warmed my heart to see you be strong for your son. My family has had to deal with a different sort of loss 5 times since late 2018. Each and every time I had to be the strong one. It's draining to say the least!
Even when one time last year, I was clearly most affected I had to keep it in . But enough about me!
Keep strong and keep being you. Always a pleasure to read you

My name is MrWrong and I approved this comment


secret_lade 47F
8753 posts
9/27/2021 5:39 pm

    Quoting citizen4722:
    I'd certainly miss my brother if he wasn't around. We kind of bounce off of each other.
My Middle Son is the glue. He was always looking out for his sister and always following in his brother's footsteps. Now that he's not here, he is sorely missed by both of them.


secret_lade 47F
8753 posts
9/27/2021 5:33 pm

    Quoting lindoboy100:
    They say that moving house is the second most stressful life event.......

    Interesting how the balance changes, now you're the one being strong. Rather lovely actually McLade. And ye're no' three bad yersel' m'dear!
What is the first most stressful even?


secret_lade 47F
8753 posts
9/27/2021 5:32 pm

    Quoting G000dbuddy:
    ...And now that I'm getting stronger....
    Great
It's taken a long time to get to where I am now emotionally... I still miss him more than anything, but I know he's going to be ok.


secret_lade 47F
8753 posts
9/27/2021 5:27 pm

    Quoting pagancountrygirl:
    You're one tough cookie, Momma Bear. But it's OK to lean on others sometimes.
    Moving is a bitch! lol You find all sorts of stuff you discover you don't need that bad, but all sorts of things you can't bear to part with, too.
Moving has TOTALLY sucked! It's stressful, it's expensive, it makes my back hurt! Everything is in disarray..... Ugh


secret_lade 47F
8753 posts
9/27/2021 5:23 pm

    Quoting mc_justmc:
    Yikes!! Moving is stressful enough without involving an ex.
Tell me about it.... My oldest son was supposed to let me borrow his truck. He ended up being a no show, which I half expected, so I had to call the ex. I knew he would be an asshole, but I knew he would help me.


secret_lade 47F
8753 posts
9/27/2021 5:19 pm

    Quoting spunkycumfun:
    I only got on with my brother while my parents were alive; once they died, me and my brother became estranged.
    I hope the move is the start of a new beginning.
I am also estranged from my brother, we have been for years now. I've always tried to instill in my kids that family is most important and they should always look out for each other. No matter what. I hope they listened, and took it to heart.


Erogedyne 69M
894 posts
9/27/2021 1:20 pm



Please check out my latest blog post "Happy Thanksgiving To One And All"


citizen4722 63M  
73456 posts
9/27/2021 9:42 am

I'd certainly miss my brother if he wasn't around. We kind of bounce off of each other.


lindoboy100 58M
23884 posts
9/27/2021 7:35 am

They say that moving house is the second most stressful life event.......

Interesting how the balance changes, now you're the one being strong. Rather lovely actually McLade. And ye're no' three bad yersel' m'dear!

Nada más que fallas......


G000dbuddy 34M  
1216 posts
9/27/2021 7:01 am

...And now that I'm getting stronger....
Great

goodbuddy781


pagancountrygirl 64F
6209 posts
9/27/2021 7:01 am

You're one tough cookie, Momma Bear. But it's OK to lean on others sometimes.
Moving is a bitch! lol You find all sorts of stuff you discover you don't need that bad, but all sorts of things you can't bear to part with, too.

Pagan
Hmmmm....I know I left that wand around here somewhere!


mc_justmc 61M  
6837 posts
9/27/2021 4:19 am

Yikes!! Moving is stressful enough without involving an ex.


spunkycumfun 61M/66F
39294 posts
9/27/2021 3:27 am

I only got on with my brother while my parents were alive; once they died, me and my brother became estranged.
I hope the move is the start of a new beginning.


secret_lade 47F
8753 posts
9/26/2021 10:21 pm

Thank you!


secret_lade 47F
8753 posts
9/26/2021 10:19 pm

    Quoting LadiesR2B1rst:
    All the best to you and your family. I've read a lot of profiles that say "No Baggage" but, real folks have real problems . Thanks for sharing.
I don't think it's possible for real human beings to not have some sort of baggage. Past relationships, kids, work, families.... We all have them.


secret_lade 47F
8753 posts
9/26/2021 10:18 pm

    Quoting CUMHANDLEME:
    I was terrified you were going to say the ex husband damaged the marines stuff.

    Silver lining is your kids need their Momma to make it better
Yes, indeed, silver linings. The ex husband definitely doesn't see the sentimental value in things like I do, especially stuff that was at my place. The stuff at my place was the stuff that I had provided for him....


secret_lade 47F
8753 posts
9/26/2021 10:13 pm

    Quoting 69ereatwetpussy:
    moving does Suck lucky for me i only move three time i my life. from the home i grew up in to the house we bought before we got married. that last one year we sold and moved closer to each other jobs. it was the right move. we had many friends to help not that much to move. our last move was 6 1/2 years ago after Super Strom Sandy flooded our home and town. the government bought over 300 home in our township. took them down we got enough to pay the morgage off that's it. but that's was ok for we had the home in NY for we cold not afford to live in NJ any more. so with many trips 31/2 hour with my truck and small trailer
    i move many things put it into the garage. when it came time we packed up the
    all the house hold things with help from friends and family we loaded the rented box truck our pick up and suv with animals and took the long drive to NY. Good Friday, Saturday morning one friend drove up to help the tree of us to empty the trucks into the garage what took al most 8 hours to fill took 2 hours to empty lololololol now we have one home in the garage and the other home filled with its own stuff now the real fun begins. oh there's a lot more to this story for the wife now wants a new home for we are living in a 1968 single wide trailer home wit many add on. and we did buy a new Double Wide.
I have moved a lot over the years.... The longest I was ever able to stay in one place was when I was married to the ex husband. This move has been by far the worst, mostly because I have to move everything up and down a flight of stairs and I'm doing just about all of it all by myself. Even though the ex husband was there yesterday, he mainly just stood by his truck and placed things in the back.


secret_lade 47F
8753 posts
9/26/2021 10:06 pm

    Quoting Paulxx001:
    This weekend, I found a forgotten pink Disneyland cap; the word 'Princess' printed in fancy white glitter across the front. It was buried in — what used to be — the closet of my youngest daughter's room. Her eyes lit up like fireworks when I handed it to her on Saturday. She adjusted the velcro, slapped it on and smiled with an ear-to-ear grin.

    She's not in the marines, and I'll probably see her next week or the week after that — but I know what you mean. I'll go through that WHOLE closet one day.

    I have to learn how to fricken stop moping on Sundays. 😶
The hard part is not seeing him, or knowing when I actually might get to see him. Talking to him on the phone from time to time is helping and it's always interesting to hear what he's got going on around him.

"You hear that Ma, that's an Apache helicopter. Two of them just flew past."

"I don't mind doing hygiene after lights out. Then I don't have to see other peoples crotches."


secret_lade 47F
8753 posts
9/26/2021 9:56 pm

    Quoting justskin1:
    Moving is hell. That is one reason I have not even looked to move in the past 9 years. Oh, and it is expensive too. It is hard when the kids grow up and go on their own.
    I hope you are settling in well. Sounds like quite a change, small town and in the country. Hope the spawn settles in soon too and likes it.
    Haven't been as regular as usual in reading my blog posters but am catching up. Take care and know you are thought of by many.
    Hugs to you.
Thank you, hugs to you as well. I haven't been posting regularly, either, too much to do and not enough time to do it in. I'll be glad when this move is finally completed and a thing of the past.


boobwhisperer69 58M  
7831 posts
9/26/2021 9:18 pm

Hugs!


justskin1 69M
12792 posts
9/26/2021 8:38 pm

Moving is hell. That is one reason I have not even looked to move in the past 9 years. Oh, and it is expensive too. It is hard when the kids grow up and go on their own.
I hope you are settling in well. Sounds like quite a change, small town and in the country. Hope the spawn settles in soon too and likes it.
Haven't been as regular as usual in reading my blog posters but am catching up. Take care and know you are thought of by many.
Hugs to you.

If you see me in the real world, come say "Hi Justskin."

I always behave. Preferably not well.


Paulxx001 64M
21898 posts
9/26/2021 6:14 pm

This weekend, I found a forgotten pink Disneyland cap; the word 'Princess' printed in fancy white glitter across the front. It was buried in — what used to be — the closet of my youngest daughter's room. Her eyes lit up like fireworks when I handed it to her on Saturday. She adjusted the velcro, slapped it on and smiled with an ear-to-ear grin.

She's not in the marines, and I'll probably see her next week or the week after that — but I know what you mean. I'll go through that WHOLE closet one day.

I have to learn how to fricken stop moping on Sundays. 😶


69ereatwetpussy 59M
6188 posts
9/26/2021 6:03 pm

moving does Suck lucky for me i only move three time i my life. from the home i grew up in to the house we bought before we got married. that last one year we sold and moved closer to each other jobs. it was the right move. we had many friends to help not that much to move. our last move was 6 1/2 years ago after Super Strom Sandy flooded our home and town. the government bought over 300 home in our township. took them down we got enough to pay the morgage off that's it. but that's was ok for we had the home in NY for we cold not afford to live in NJ any more. so with many trips 31/2 hour with my truck and small trailer
i move many things put it into the garage. when it came time we packed up the
all the house hold things with help from friends and family we loaded the rented box truck our pick up and suv with animals and took the long drive to NY. Good Friday, Saturday morning one friend drove up to help the tree of us to empty the trucks into the garage what took al most 8 hours to fill took 2 hours to empty lololololol now we have one home in the garage and the other home filled with its own stuff now the real fun begins. oh there's a lot more to this story for the wife now wants a new home for we are living in a 1968 single wide trailer home wit many add on. and we did buy a new Double Wide.


CUMHANDLEME 59F  
790 posts
9/26/2021 5:54 pm

I was terrified you were going to say the ex husband damaged the marines stuff.

Silver lining is your kids need their Momma to make it better

Do you have any Primal Urges ... I do, please CUMHANDLEME and explore some of my naughty and nice Primal ... Urges with me !!!


LadiesR2B1rst 58M  
1721 posts
9/26/2021 5:26 pm

All the best to you and your family. I've read a lot of profiles that say "No Baggage" but, real folks have real problems . Thanks for sharing.


theProgramX 29M  
2 posts
9/26/2021 5:16 pm

I like this blog! Well written


secret_lade 47F
8753 posts
9/26/2021 4:57 pm

The Ex Husband helped me move a truck load of boxes to the house today, only one more to go.

What an ordeal.

I can honestly say, this moving thing sucks.

The day before my Marine left for boot camp he had packed up all of his stuff and put it in a giant tote for safe keeping and slide it into a closet, out of the way. The tote emerged today and I immediately got weepy just seeing it, and knowing what was inside.

"Do you want me to keep this at my house? I can just slide it into a crawl space until he gets back."

That will be four years at the minimum....

"Ok. He's got some really expensive gaming equipment in there. Really expensive...."

"It'll be ok. I'm going to take it right into the house as soon as I get home, it's not going to sit outside and get rained on or anything."

"Ok, keep it safe."

He opened the lid to the tote to take a peek at what was inside, his cap and gown caught me immediately off guard. I could still see his smiling face wearing that cap and gown, handing me a yellow carnation.

"Here you go Ma, this is for you."

Not going to lie, I still feel like a piece of me is missing without my Marine around, but it's getting easier to accept and move forward. It sure hurt like hell to watch that tote leave, though, on the back of the Ex Husband's truck. It almost felt like I was losing him all over again....

We are all feeling the loss, though.

My Oldest Son had called me up Friday night and wanted to talk.

A little unusual for him....

During the course of the conversation he had asked me if I'd heard from the Marine. My heart went out to him. He asked me if I would tell the Marine next time I hear from him that he misses him and loves him.

I said I would.

I listened to my Oldest Son cry on the other end of the phone for the first time in quite a few years.

He was missing his brother.

Up until that point I had always been the basket case, crying every time I turned around. It didn't occur to me that others were only keeping it together because they knew I could not.

And now that I'm getting stronger....

It's their turn to come to me for comfort. To release their own emotions.

I surely do miss my Marine, my Middle Son, but life is slowly moving forward and good changes are happening. I hope the good changes are happening for him as well.

Happy Sunday!


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